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India will have to start talking about it,” she added.
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The issue needs to be introduced to children in teen-age or college-age so that they know about privacy and know how to avoid similar situations when they have a family. “Maybe it is because we don’t talk about marital sex. It also depends on the age of the child,” she said.Īlthough she acknowledges that often, couples are forced have sex while their children sleep next to them, she says there is a lack of awareness about the impact of such a situation. They might even feel that their mother is being abused. They may not know what they have seen and may be unable to verbalise it. “It is not abuse, but for a child, this can be scary. Children can be distracted or worried and may not be able to say anything or react,” she says.Ĭhild rights activist and former Chairperson of the Karnataka State Commission for Protection of Child Rights (KSCPCR) Nina Nayak said that it is “not good for the psyche of children” to watch their parents in sexual acts and that such situations should be avoided. Some children, especially girls, can develop an aversion to sex. Another thought of it while masturbating. “One child got frightened and thought his father was trying to kill his mother. She has had several patients, including children and young adolescents, tell her that they had seen their parents having sex. She goes on to add that it is important to understand that, should children witness their parents having sex, the impact would depend on their age, and could also be long-lasting. This is just about parents having normal sexual relations,” Dr Jayanthini says.
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“This is not child abuse or emotional abuse. She however says the discussion in developed countries that this could amount to abuse was not correct. While understanding that lack of privacy due to small-size houses may force parents to have sex when their children are in the same room, Chennai-based child psychiatrist Dr V Jayanthini says that some caution is advisable. However, another reason why such a situation may arise, is that children in Indian families often tend to sleep with their parents until they are several years old, compared with children in western countries, where children are brought up differently. These numbers are the same as in the 2001 Census. Unless you draw attention to this your brother will continue his abuse and potentially ruin your life.In India however, such a scenario is quite common for at least two reasons: lack of space and parenting style.Īccording to the 2011 Census, 39 percent of households surveyed said they had a one-room house – 74 million households – while 3 percent said that they no exclusive room – six million households. Once you tell what's been happening, there may be major disruption in the family.īut you're too young to protect yourself, so you must speak out.
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I know revealing your secret must be very scary.
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If that's too difficult, tell a teacher or someone else you trust or call ChildLine, the free helpline for children and young people, on 0800 1111. You need to tell your parents what's been going on. All the blame lies on your brother's shoulders. It's important to understand you're not responsible for any of this. You can make any excuse for him you like but what he's doing is sexual abuse - the stronger taking advantage of the weak and innocent. Sooner or later you'll come to understand this isn't normal behaviour. The problem isn't just that you could end up pregnant, it's also the damage there's likely to be to your emotional health and self-respect. Your strong feelings of attachment to him are all mixed up with your burgeoning sexuality and that's why you're at his mercy.
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Game of Thrones TV Series Friends TV Series Lost TV Series Supernatural TV Series Skins TV Series Life With Derek TV Series. He knows what he's doing is very wrong and that's why he's working hard to convince you to keep silent. Tune into Friends on MTV starting Sunday, January 1. It doesn't matter whether you consent or not. This is an incestuous relationship and, even if he wasn't your brother, he would still be breaking the law as sex is illegal under the age of 16. THIS is not a situation that can continue and I urge you to stop having sex immediately. My brother says it's our secret and I mustn't tell anyone. I hope they never find out as I think they won't understand the attraction we feel for each other. Our mum and dad haven't got a clue about what's going on, although Dad almost caught us a few weeks ago. I didn't resist because it felt nice and he was very gentle. LAST year my brother came into my room in the middle of the night and got into bed with me.